


FLCL: An Alternate Vespa Woman

by DemonFang



Category: FLCL
Genre: Alternate Character Interpretation, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Drabble Collection, Gen, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Random & Short, Random Encounters, Short & Sweet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-16
Updated: 2018-08-16
Packaged: 2019-06-28 11:08:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15706014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DemonFang/pseuds/DemonFang
Summary: A bunch of FLCL drabbles and short stories set in an alternate reality where Haruko is just... overall a nicer person-ish and just a LITTLE less hung up on Atomsk, enough so that she hangs around after the events of the first series. Pretty experimental and just for fun. Will contain elements and characters from Progressive and Alternative (once that releases), and also probably some stuff from my own theories/headcanons about the show. Each story will have a description of what the story actually is and who is present. These stories could go anywhere - either serious, or funny, or anything in between. Rated T in case of bad language in later stories, but rating should never (hopefully) go above that. Enjoy!





	FLCL: An Alternate Vespa Woman

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to whatever the heck this is. FLCL has been my favourite anime for about ten years now but I've never had the balls to write anything for it before - its such a complex series and with so many things going on, I felt like I'd never be able to do it justice. But I recently rewatched it with the release of Progressive, and I just felt... inspired, to try some new things. 
> 
> These stories are basically going to be AU-based character studies of Haruko - about what she would be like if she was a bit more like her other half, Jinyu. Basically, she's still Haruko - just less of trying to devour a giant fire chicken, and more caring towards the kids she otherwise would have manipulated. I decided this would be a good place to start with FLCL, because writing short stories that don't take themselves too seriously would be a good way for me to explore the characters and their (potential) friendships in more detail and learn more about how I portray them without writing something super deep and getting it totally wrong. Hopefully, you guys can enjoy these as much as I do writing them! Without further adieu;
> 
> This one's called "Cookies". It's based off of this video: https://youtu.be/E1p_cJLu7vs
> 
> It's the kind of thing I imagine Haruko and Naota get up to in the kitchen sometimes when she's not playing mind games with the poor boy. I think they have a really good time - that is, until Haruko messes it up somehow. As per usual.

“Tak-kun, the box said that there was enough mix for three dozen cookies,” Haruko’s face was bunched up like a candy wrapper, her wolf gold eyes scrutinizing the box. “So why the hell did you only make four?” 

True enough, on the baking tray was four individual milk chocolate chip cookies, cooked until golden brown, perfectly aligned and driving Haruko internally insane. She barely even knew what cookies were – there was nothing like this in the worlds she’d visited before now, but even she understood better than Naota apparently did. Still, she couldn’t hide the smirk when the flour-covered boy burst into a fit of giggles, trying to reply to her, but he seemed inconsolable. It was the combination of her hunchbacked cartoon-like form, baffled expression and the four cookies placed sadly on the tray that did it to him.   
“My homework said-! Just four-!” He managed to burst out through his laughing, to which Haruko scanned the bread table located behind them, where Canti was rolling dough for the bakery’s stock. Naota’s worksheet was perilously close to the edge, no doubt moved by their antics in the kitchen. She glanced over it – then sighed in frustration, her eyebrow twitching.  
“This says four different flavours of cookie, Dumbass – not four cookies!”   
“Oh, woops.” Naota seemed to deflate like a burst balloon – she frowned in response, gears turning in her head, wondering how to fix this before the boy decided he was going to give up and storm off to his room.   
“Howzabout this,” She steered him to the countertop they were using, placing his hands on the cookie dough mix they had leftover – presumably for the remaining 2.6 dozen cookies. “You make as many cookies as you can outta this, and I’ll go find more ingredients for them, alright?”   
“Uhh, sure.” Naota got to work, taking pieces of the dough and rolling them into small spheres, placing them on a fresh tray. 

Haruko didn’t have to wander too far – she wondered if Kamon would mind if she stole some stuff from the bakery cupboard – remembered that she didn’t ACTUALLY care – and peeled back the squeaky door. It had a very recognizable squeak, one that made Naota’s ears prick.  
“Wrong one, Haruko.” Naota reminded her.  
“Naaaaah, it isn’t,” She purred, clawing inside for anything of use. “How about raisins?”   
“Euch,” Naota replied. “Raisins are for boring old adults!”   
“They’d get you in your teacher’s good books though, right? Besides isn’t this just an assignment? You’re not actually eating them?” She placed the raisin bag down, deciding Naota would probably get a better score if he just used them.  
“Well… maybe I wanted to eat them.”   
“That’s how you get fat, Tak-kun!” She teased. “How about… laxatives? They’re for boring old adults too.” What on earth laxatives were doing in the baking cupboard, she was too creeped out to find out. A small snicker escaped Naota’s throat.   
“I think I’d get kicked outta school…”   
“Would be worth it,” Haruko disregarded the box of laxatives and pulled out a bag of cinnamon. “This’ll do. One more…”   
“This is so dumb,” The boy groaned. His hands were starting to cramp from rolling up so many dough balls. “I’m only in Elementary School! Why should I have to learn to bake?”   
“Baking is a very useful skill,” Haruko chided, bringing over the raisins, cinnamon, and a bar of white chocolate she’d found at the final moment. “When you find a girl you like, you could make her a cake to win her affection, hmm?” 

Naota blushed, snatching the bag of cinnamon so he had something else to focus on.  
“I don’t think the girl I like cares about cakes.” 

She leaned over him, examining his work in progress and he snorted. She lacked any sense of personal space at all.   
“Eh, they look fine to me,” She grabbed the bar of white chocolate and moved towards the microwave – before glancing at the cupboard again, thinking about the laxatives. “Start sprinkling cinnamon on them, ‘kay? I have an idea.” 

Naota practically beamed uncharacteristically when he presented his cookies the next day, despite his nervousness, having an amusing time telling his classmates that it had been the infamous Vespa Woman who had helped him bring the tasty treats to life. Of course, having her occasionally dropping him off there on the back of said Vespa didn’t help matters, but he didn’t care. She was a menace, sure, but she was a fun menace to have around. 

When their teacher, Miya-Jun, asked to try one, he remembered that adults liked raisin cookies and handed her one. She praised it and he felt a sigh of relief bubbling beneath the surface, having survived a presentation he’d honestly been dreading, even with Haruko’s help.

Yet, the satisfied look quickly slipped off his face when some time later Miya-Jun’s stomach let out an agonized groan like the growls of a dragon and she went charging for the bathroom, tears in her eyes. He could literally sense Haruko laughing back home. She was such a pain.


End file.
